Once I was really horny and my older brother was having a sleepover with his cute best friend. While they were sleeping I used my bro's best friend's hand to rub my vagina. In the morning he said "what is this shit on my hand" and I told him I accidentally got glue on him... He knew I was lying about something. Until this day I still feel embarrassed whenever he looks at me.



When I was little I used to mix up condoms and condos. So whenever I watched the news and they said something about a condo, I thought they were talking about a condom.



I've cried almost every day since I was thirteen. I was infatuated with a boy in the 8th grade and I lied and told some of my friends we were dating secretly. Word got out, and I looked like a wierdo. He denied of course. I planned on riding that bitch until the wheels fell off. I guess they are starting to get wobbly. It kinda broke my pathetic heart. To this day I've never had a "real" boyfriend.



Every time I take a book in the library, I write the ending on the first page, so that I ruin it for everybody else after me. #lol #mean



Once, two years ago, I ran into another class and yelled "Troll!! In the dungeon!!" and pretended to pass out. As my teacher was calling the ambulance, a girl in the class said "Fifty points to gryffindor!". To this day we are still dating.


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