I never sit on my friends' lap, because I'm scared that i'll feel a boner. #awkward



I kid in my school made fun of me for the past 4 years, saying that i'm gay, and bullying me in real life and on the internet. What he doesn't know, is that for at least half of that time, i've been having sex with his girlfriends. I'm not that gay, am i? #revenge



I have a crush on my daughter's ex boyfriend. I feel like a teenager...



I stole toys from my day care center. I think everybody has, except i'm not a little kid, i work there. I just can't resist playing legos!



I love to pose nude. Walk around naked with the blinds open day or night, so ladies can see me.


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