I sent a guy a pic of me in a bikini top. I said sorry if my ugliness shocked you. He said "no shock, I was expecting it". I think I might stay single forever.
I cut a hole in my giant teddy bear, and I have sex with it every day after school. sorry mr Patches!
When I was younger, I would lock my great grandma down the basement. Now I feel really bad that I did that and that I can't say sorry because she passed a few years ago.