When I was 13 I texted my mom and told her I was pregnant. The problem is that i meant to say "practicing".
I'm really close with my ex's best friend. We were getting food together one day and he said something hilarious, but that you know you should scold in public. Although I didn't mean to, I yelled my ex's name at him, instead of his own. Oops... guess my feelings are loud and clear.
I always had this irrational fear that only me and my family could see the clothes we had on (because I thought we were mentally ill), and that people didn't tell us , because they didn't want to be mean to mentally ill people. I was so afraid people were looking (and laughing) at my "willy" that I made a habit out of wearing two pairs of underwear... Just to be safe!
I'm glad that my parents still have sex, because it means that they still love each other. But I'd like to tell them that walls are very thin in our house and some of the sounds they do make me really uncomfortable.
I told my kids to mark their territory once, and when I walked in the living room a minute later, I saw them peeing all over the carpet as their territory... I guess they didn't know I meant mark their height on the wall :|