Last year in class, I had this really hot teacher who always showed cleavage. One time I threw my gum at her and it landed between her tits and she told me to come get it... So I did and got a boner... in front of my entire class.
One time, when my friend was over, we were going to go in my brother's room to use his legos, but when we walked in he had his penis in a hotdog bun and was taking pictures.
Once I was eating jello with my best friends and after eating like twenty little cups of jello we realized they were jello shots. There was a lot of alcohol in them. That night we had our first lesbian experience.
One night my mom and I were staying at a Sunday house (a hotel/motel). At around 5:10 am I was the only one up and she farted really loudly, then she did it again even louder. A few minutes later we got a call from the front desk saying someone made a complaint about the noise coming from our room.
When I was 11 I was starting to lose faith in santa's existence so to convince me he was real my dad dressed up like him and made a lot of noise Christmas night. I went out to see what all the commotion was and saw an obvious impostor, so I snuck back to my room, grabbed my pellet gun, and called the police. Inevitably i shot my dad about 40 times and got a swat team response.