My daughter ruined my life. I had her when I was 16 and her mom died giving birth to her. I had to leave school and start working 14 hours a day just to maintain her. The only reason why I kept her is because the girls that I meet are touched by the story and I take advantage of it.
I like the smell of weird things like the new car smell. I also like the smell of freezers. One time this girl, my sister's friend, got a new bike. It was sitting in the driveway. I smelt the wheels for a while. #weird
I was home alone, so I got bored and went in my parent's medicine closet. I found a bottle that said 'juicy pineapple,' so I picked it up. I drank a little, and then i found out it was pineapple flavored lube. #fml