One time, as i was paying for lunch, i got a text from my girlfriend saying "i love you". When the waiter thanked me, i accidentally said "i love you too".



One time in 4th grade I threw up on my teacher on purpose, because she was a bitch. It was pretty funny.



When I was little my dad would blow up condoms, because he didn't have balloons.



When I was 8 I though sex was toughing something while you here naked. So one day I got out of the shower and petted my dog. Butt naked. I hurried up and got dressed and went down stairs. I yelled to my mum and dad "Mom I just had sex!!". You should if seen the loom on their faces. #lol



When i was little and i would play with barbies, sometimes i would make up such complicated and realistic stories that i would end up crying.


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